Fixing the Soul
by Lovemyphone
Summary: In a Supernatural world where males can turn into animals and everyone has a soul mate a broke Chu Ga Eul has given up on life. Abused by her father and picked on at school by none other that Yi Jeong. What happens when they are soul mates. Can ga Eul love him? Can Yi Jeong forgive himself for what he did to Ga Eul?
1. Chapter 1

Ga Eul is a broken Soul. Ruined by her father who abused her for years making her believe she was worthless. Yi Jeong an old classmate who use to pick on her now also feels guilty. Believing that he himself cursed Ga Eul for her fate can he allow himself to fully love her without being clouded by guilt. Can Ga Eul forgive Yi Jeong? Will they be able to over come all the onstacles that are thrown their way. Throw them in to the lives of supernatural beings were all males turn into animals, Yi Jeong being a future King, a past love from Ga Eul, and an evil Prince named Su Pyo. Can this love begin before any of these obstacles destroy them?

**Fixing the Soul**

Chapter 1: The Beginning

*Bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump*  
There it was again that feeling at the pit of my stomach. The same feeling that never fades away. My heart feels like it's drumming in my ears and it's in slow motion. This world wasn't made for people like me; the fragile, the weak, people who break. Maybe if this was back then, years before the great Nova outbreak things would have been different. Maybe I could have fought back. The sand truth was I was always weak. The super nova outbreak happened long before I was born. Years and years back long before any of our parents, or our grandparents and great grandparents were born. Some people say it was a chemical in the air that produced these super human being. Others, the more narcissistic, and self centered beings believe it was a gift given by god. No one really knows how the Super Novas happened only that one day the male population suddenly began to transform themselves into super beings. Animals. Wolves, Tigers, Lions, Bears, Hyenas. The list goes on. Females on the other hand stayed the same or so I'd like to think. We don't transform into super beings. We don't have super speed. All that we can do is make connections. Connections with out super nova. Our Soul mate. For any girl it may sound romantic and it is. Everyone that finds their significant other lives on cloud nine. You love each other so much that you literally die without them. It's an intense attraction , love, lust, friendship all wrapped into one. Before in the times of our grandparents it was all determined by the heart. You would go out into the world in hopes of finding that true love. That speck of wishful thinking and just wanting to find someone to love you unconditionally. Of course that was back then, now everyone does it by having their DNA samples sent to our NOVA Research lab. Out of everyone in this huge abnormal world there is only one other DNA that can be a match to your, your mate. Everyone is destined for someone, everyone deserved love. Everyone but me.

"Your going to be late for school you stupid girl!" My father yells and I have a hard time adjusting my eyes to the light. Before I can say anything he's already pulling me out of the panic room and all I can do is lay there. My legs feel like jelly and I can't get up. How long was I in there? 2 days? Maybe a week? I don't really know.  
"I said get up" My father yells his tone filled with rage that it makes me cringe and before I know it I'm being kicked in my side. I don't cry out only let out a small whimper hoping he doesn't hear. The worse I scream the more punishment I receive. I don't ask for my mother because I know well that she herself is trapped here. I stand up and my legs begin to shake while I try to find my footing. I'm so weak and hungry but I need to get ready for school. Making my way to the bathroom across the hall I hold on to the wall. One foot at a time with slow little steps because my feet wobble to much. Finally after what seems like hours but I know is only minutes I manage to get to the bathroom. I make my way to the shower and turn on the hot water letting it steam up the bathroom to give me some sort of warmth and comfort because I feel ice cold. I undress and I try not to look at myself in the mirror because I know how badly bruised I am. But my arms, my stomach, my legs I can still see all the colors. Blue, green, yellow, purple I feel numb. I no longer feel the physical pain anymore. I've learned to tolerate it, I can almost ignore it without complain or even without crying out. Inside however, inside I feel so hurt. That heart and soul that I have, that I am, is nothing but shambles. A shell of something that could have been. Stepping into the shower I let the warm water relieve the pressure in my back. My muscles feel soar from being in the same sitting position for so many days. My neck burns and I can hardly swallow my own saliva. He likes to choke me until I pass out. I know his hand prints are on my neck but I can feel all the hurt he's caused me deep in my soul.

I close my eyes trying to relax, to bring some sort of peace in me just for a few seconds because I know my nightmare isn't done yet. I can't, I can never hear my own thoughts not with my fathers voice in my head. His angry face looking at me and those angry yellow piercing eyes glaring, Worthless, Pathetic, Ungrateful, Useless. Over and over those words circle in my head and no matter how hard I try there never is an off button. Maybe because it's the way I feel too.  
"Sweetie your going to be late for school" I hear my mother say. Her voice groggy and I know she's been crying. I don't reply but I turn off the shower and reach for a towel. Wrapping it around myself I wince because the fabric seems to rough on my bruised skin. My feet seem to have awoken again because I can now move them again without wobbling. Opening the bathroom door my mother is standing there her eyes red and puffy and her face covered in black and blue. I don't say anything, not because I don't care but because I never know what to say to her. There are times when I'm angry at her for keeping me here with them, for not saving me. Then I remember she can't do anything to save us. She herself is trapped here except I can leave to school and never come back and she can't. In the end though I always come back not because I'm afraid but because of her.  
"Your neck" My mother says and though she tries to reach out to me I cringe away. I know she'd never hurt me but still, I can't bare anyone's touch. They'd be tainted, cursed.  
"I'm fine." I manage to say and for a moment my mother just looks at me her brown eyes searching for something that I can't understand.  
"okay" She finally says and I can only nod to her before walking away towards the basement.

My room is big but there's nothing much there. The walls are coming apart. There's a washer and dryer to the left. No posters, no pictures, nothing that says someone lives down here other than the small little mattress on the floor. My clothes are neatly piled to the side and my books are all stuffed in my backpack. Reaching for something to wear I grab an ugly puke green turtle neck sweater and a pair of faded blue jeans. Everything in my wardrobe I get at the local church because my father never buys me clothes. When I was little my mother and I would go down to the local church to get clothes for her and I but now I had to go by myself. Getting dressed was always a hard task for me. Lifting my arms moving around in general caused my bruising body to ache. Finally after I was done I gathered my old brown back pack and walked back upstairs. Before reaching the top I could already see a piece of toast placed on a napkin. Taking it I stood at the steps for a few seconds securely wrapping it in the napkin and then stuffing it in my pocket. I knew that if I got caught I'd be in trouble so I simply made my way out of the house. From outside everything seemed normal. The house looked like any other house in the block. White, green grass, beautiful roses at the front. Picture perfect for everyone to look at.  
"Going to school Ga- Eul?" Mr. Park from across the street asked. He was a nice old man who mostly kept to himself. He's lived across the street from our family for years. His wife passed away a few months ago but he seemed fine though people knew it would only be a matter of time before he to passed away.  
"Yes Mr. Park. Have a nice day" I manage to say and though I try to smile it seems neither of us really has the strength to do so. Instead I make my way to the bus stop 2 blocks from here and I sit by at the bench to wait. Like always I lean my hair to the front allowing myself to shield my face. Though there is no bruising there I still feel the need to hide.

When the bus finally arrives I get in paying my $1.50 fee I sit at the back quietly. No one ever talks here. Not that anyone really rides the bus. Mostly females and the occasional senior nova who can no longer shift.

*Bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump*

Even before the bus comes to the halt I can feel it in my chest. My stomach seems to drop and I find it hard to get up. Somehow I manage to find my footing and all I can do is make my way to the door. I don't want to. I hate school. High School is always hard for anyone. But when you're new, a freshman, nerdy, and at a prep school for the rich. Walking down the hallway I can't help but keep my head down.  
"Lyric. How was your weekend"  
I can recognize the voice simply because she's the only one that speaks to me. Out of everyone at school she's the only one that's different. Offering her a small shrug she smiles at me and continues to speak. I don't really listen simply because I'm afraid of what happens next. What always happens next.  
"I'll see you in class okay" Jan Di says her eyes lighting up before she walks away. Her locker is on the second floor mine is on the bottom floor.

*Bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump*

Each step that I take I can feel the knot twisting further and further. I keep my head down trying to protect myself as much as I can. Though I know it doesn't help it makes me feel safer. I can hear him first. His laid back laughter and his cheerful voice. He's talking to his friends before he tells them to leave.  
So Yi Jeong. Even in Super Nova life there is always going to be someone on top. Our world is mostly at peace. No one really fights and there isn't many wars. Two kingdoms divide this planet which we call home. The Kingdom of Archer and The Kingdom of Cray. The Kingdom of Archer is peaceful King So is the fair King, Father of Prince So Yi Jeong and So Il Hyun.

"You know it's not Halloween yet. Or are you late for the graveyard shift?" Yi Jeong says.  
I can feel myself shrinking but I try not to let it faze me. I never understood why Yi Jeong always makes me feel disarmed. Laid bare for all to see. It was as if he could see all my faults, all those flaws, all the ugly that I really was. For that reason I could never look him in the eyes to afraid of what he might see, what he might confirm. I could always mask my emotions around him, around everyone. Pretending had become a necessity in order to survive and I was an expert. I continued to ignore him opening my locker I shifted my back pack toward the front in order to take out my textbooks.  
"Why do you come here?" Yi Jeong asks. His question causing me to still. There's something different in his voice. Usually he only makes fun of my clothes or makes jokes about the way I look. This time. I can feel it in my chest again.  
*Bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump*  
"Why do you come here?" He asks again but I simply finish emptying my books in my locker only taking my math book and closing my locker. I try to walk away but his words stop me.  
"Everyone at this school hates you" He says my back is now to him.  
"You show up every single day. Why? Your just a joke." He says and now not only am I hearing his words but my fathers. The entire hallway has now grown quiet. Waiting.  
*Bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump*  
"Parker leave her alone" I hear someone say the voice fading in my ears.  
*Bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump*  
"Do us all a favor and disappear. The world would be a lot better if people like you weren't in it" Yi Jeong says.  
*Bump, ba-bump, a-bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump*  
My heart is racing now loudly in my ears, wanting to jump out of my chest. No one is saying anything and all I can hear is my own heart beat.  
"You son of a bitch!"  
*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump*  
Like an explosion or a large wave the silence is suddenly broken by Jan Di. I can't hear what she's saying anymore my racing heart is to much. I can't look up and I can't move it's only when I feel Jan Di take my arm and pull me away that I react. She doesn't say anything to me and takes me to the bathroom. It's only when she hands me a tissue that I realize tears are silently falling down my cheeks.  
*Bump, ba-bump,ba-bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump, Bump, ba-bump, ba- bump*  
My heart continues to tick almost like a bomb with a timer. Waiting to explode. Waiting to finally break.

***  
A/N This is my first chapter I know it's very depressing but it will get better. The next chapter will be in Yi Jeong's Point of View.


	2. Chapter 1 part 2 Beginning (Yi Jeong)

Hey everyone thanks for reading. To answer a question sent to me. About Ga Eul's father I can't reveal that answer right now only that I will explain it in an upcoming chapter.

_**Regrets. Everyone has them. Some people have many while others don't. Even the smallest thing you do has an impact. Like a leaf falling into a still lake. The leaf is light delicate and when it hits the water it lands softly in the small pool ricocheting into small waves. No matter what you do any small action good or bad impacts people in so many different ways that it almost seems unrealistic. Had I known what future was set for the two of us I would have never allowed myself to go that far….**_

"Can you hurry up we're going to be late"  
Groaning I tried to ignore the pounding outside my room door and simply covered my face with my pillow. I had stayed up all last night trying to finish an English report on Poe. We were given almost two weeks time but I could never do anything on time. My brother Il Hyun says I'm lazy I just call it having a life and friends.  
"Yi Jeong!" He called out again groaning I sat up annoyed throwing my pillow at the door.  
"Alright already I'm getting up!" I yelled. Moving the bed sheet away from me I sat up. I never really understood the point of going to school It wasn't like we were actually going to do something after High School. The life of a Prince is hard. You have duties to your kingdom and the people in it. Normally a prince is home schooled; father however thought we should interact with our people. Not that I mind in fact I prefer it.  
"Yi Jeong you have five minutes or I'm telling our driver to leave without you!" Il Hyun yelled again.  
" Just go I'll run to school" I yelled in irritation. It wasn't like we needed to be driven around. We were faster than cars in our wolf forms anyways. It was always the same with him. All of my friends are irritating as well. Of Course the most irritating of them all was Goo Jun Pyo. He's been crushing on Geum Jan Di since we were kids. I can remember watching them together when we were young. Thinking of Jan Di I couldn't help but feel that irritation gnawing away at the pit of my stomach. Every time I think of Jan Di that little thing she calls a friend comes to mind.  
"Forget it I need to get ready for school" I mutter to myself before I turn on the shower.

By the time I arrive to school I only have 5 minutes before the bell maybe less. I'm quick to go to my locker ignoring anyone that calls my name because I need to hurry. I need to see her. I don't know why I feel the need to do it every single day. It's become a habit of mine almost an addiction like smoking. It's not healthy but I need to do it anyways to feel better; at ease. Once I'm at my locker I realize she hasn't arrived yet and I begin to empty the contents of my backpack into the locker as slowly as I possibly can. I don't want her to think I'm waiting for her.  
"Hey man why are you in such a hurry" My friend Woo Bin says coming over to me and patting me on the back.  
"Masters is giving us an English test today on Poe and our papers are due you know how she is. If you're late you don't get in to her class and I can't afford another F if I want to graduate" I lie.  
"Relax man. You're the Alpha Wolf I don't think graduation will matter. " Goo Jun Pyo adds..  
"Tell that to our father he's threatened to hang Parker by his tail if he doesn't graduate. Something about not being responsible" I'll Hyun says his green eyes glistening with mischief while Goo Jun Pyo himself laughs his booming laughter echoing out in the halls.  
"I take it Jan Di hasn't arrived yet" I say to Jun Pyo who glares.  
"When are you going to ask her out man. It's getting boring" Ji Hoo says to Jun Pyo.  
"When he grows a pair." I mutter causing Woo Bin to laugh and Jun Pyo to glare.  
"It's complicated you know there are rules to this and although some of us don't follow them as a council members son I have to" Jun Pyo said. Although I hated to admit it he was right.

In our world there were rules for us. Super Novas were not allowed to date anyone other than their mate. The bad of it all was the fact that you have to be 21 for the process to start. Some Novas like Woo Bin who happened to be a large black panther would sneak around with the females. If you were caught you would be penalized nothing major just a few added months to your wait to find your mate. It wasn't unheard of for Super Novas to go out of their way and date a few females. Other than the fact of being able to transform into enormous animals we're all still regular teenager. Just like all teenagers we all have urges.

"Rules are made to break you know." I tell Jun Pyo who shakes his head.  
"And what will you tell your soul mate when she finds out you've been unfaithful to her with at least 5 women" Ill Hyun adds while Jun Pyo and Ji Hoo both nod agreeing. Both of them were so full of it.  
"She'll understand" I say shrugging.  
"Father won't" I'll Hyun adds.

*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump*  
I can feel it. Without even looking I already know she's here simply because that feeling is gnawing at me again.  
*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump*  
I try not to move and my hands begin to sweat. The urge to readjust my suit jacket comes and I simply stuff my hands in my pockets to stop myself.

*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump*  
I'm no longer hearing anything being said by any of them because all I can think about it that gnawing feeling inside that keeps getting bigger.

*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump*  
There she was again. She was the quietest and smartest girl in school. Why did he pick on her? Maybe it was because he could. After all he was older. Maybe it was because everyone in town knew who his family was. Nova royalty. He watched her walk down the hallway her head down like always Jan Di glaring at anyone who dared speak a word to the fragile little girl next to her. Jan Di's eyes fierce looking as if she was shooting lightning out of her brown eyes. Yi Jeong understood why Jan Di was so overprotective though he couldn't stop himself from bothering her anyways.

Her locker is next to mine. I always wait for her to come. Why? I like bothering her getting under her skin. Maybe it's because she never reacts. It doesn't seem to faze her. She never cries like I hope a fragile little girl like her will. Instead she makes me feel invisible unheard; because of it I feel the need to say things to her to see if it'll one day reach her ears. It's childish I know; but I've never liked being ignored by anyone even if it is just her. I don't know her name and I don't need to. I just knows her as Jan Di's little friend. What I do know is that I like to talk to her even if she can't hear it. I always try to see a tear fall. Hoping to get a reaction. Maybe it's fascination that I feel or something else I'm not sure. The only thing I do know is that I need it. Whatever it is. Whatever she is I need it.

"You know it's not Halloween yet. Or are you late for the graveyard shift?" I ask her. Still she does nothing and continues what she's doing. The people around us laugh and yet she doesn't say anything. There's no reaction on her face that I can see either, simply because her chocolate brown hair is covering her face. I know I shouldn't I know it's not right. Part of mind always screams at me to stop while the other part eggs me on to go further.  
"Why do you come here?" I ask her and for the first time I see her react. If only for a second her posture goes rigid. Still it's quick to fade and she continues to ignore me taking a few books out from her locker.  
Why do you come here?" I ask again but she ignores me and tries to walk away.

*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump*  
Somehow I can't stop myself from speaking anymore the voice in my head telling me to stop has already faded in the back overpowered by the need to get a reaction of any kind.  
"Everyone at this school hates you" I tell her and her posture goes rigid her back facing me.  
"You show up every single day. Why? Your just a joke." I tell her I have the urge to turn her around and see her reaction but just as my hand reaches out to her right shoulder Il Hyun speaks.  
"Yi Jeong leave her alone" Il Hyun says his eyes angry but I can't help what comes out next.  
"Do us all a favor and disappear. The world would be a lot better if people like you weren't in it" I tell her my mind suddenly turning off unsure if those words had come out of my mouth.  
"You son of a bitch!"  
Before I have time to react Jan Di is already standing in front of me her eyes ice cold with fury.  
*Smack*  
Though I realize it should hurt to be slapped somehow I can't feel it. All I can do is look at the girl with her back to me. She's standing there quietly without a word though everyone else is now whispering around her. I realize she must not be aware of it either.  
"You guys are a bunch of jerks. Just leave her alone! She's not bothering anyone." Jan Di says her eyes turning to Jun Pyo for a brief second furious at him as well before she takes her friend by the hand dragging her away from everyone's view.  
"Dude" Woo Bin says though he is no longer smiling and there's a look of disbelief in his eyes before he shakes his head and walks away.  
"What?" I manage to say to Jun Pyo who's glaring at me. Running a hand though his curly hair he sighs in frustration and doesn't say anything to me before walking away.

**_Had I known what would happen to her maybe I would have never said anything. I would have apologized to her and tried to make things better. Unfortunately things never work out the way we plan them to…_**

How long has it been since I last saw her? One month?…Maybe two? Everyone at school thinks she ran away. That makes me feel bad. Other people think she actually killed herself and it's only a matter of time before someone finds her body. That brings chills to my entire body and I find myself unable to breathe when I think about it.  
"Hey Yi Jeong" Woo Bin calls out snapping me out of my thoughts. Closing my locker I simply turn to him.  
"What's up"  
"You coming down to Devils Creek with us? There's going to be girls" Woo Bin says.  
"I think I'll just hang out at my place" I tell him shrugging.  
"Come on man it'll be fun. I have this girl for you her name is Grace or something." Woo Bin says.  
"No thanks man" I tell him.  
"Come on. I told her friend I'd hook her up with you. Do me a solid" Woo Bin says and I sigh and nod feeling irritated. Still Woo BIn simply smiles pats me on the back and walks away. I make my way out of school and to the parking lot where Jun Pyo is waiting and so is Ill Hyun with our driver Neil. I can tell Jun Pyo's angry at me because he looks like he's spouting smoke from his ears.  
"What now?" I ask irritated.  
"Thanks to you Jan Di is pissed at me again" Jun Pyo says  
"What did I do?" I asked  
"You mean other than insult her best friend" Jun Pyo says to me.  
"Aside from that" I said to him.  
"They took away Ga Eul's scholarship. Because she's missed so many classes and her grades dramatically dropped she's been expelled from school and now Jan Di is blaming me for not stopping you again" Jun Pyo said irritated before walking away. Turning to Il Hyun he simply shakes his head and gets in the car leaving me to wallow in my misery.

**_Maybe I deserved what happened next as a lesson but she didn't deserve this. No one does…_**

Devils creek. What was so special about it. Only us Super Novas could ever go down it. It's almost like going down a large mountain with unsteady rocks. Impossible to scale for a human. You have to be fast and you have to be agile. The creak is a dump filled with trash but everyone goes down there to get drunk and hook up with girls. Most of the time the Novas let the girls climb on their back in their animal form so they can get them down there.  
"Where the hell where you?" Woo Bin asks handing me a drink once I've shifted back into my human form and changed behind some bushes.  
"Sorry. Overslept" I lied. The truth was I didn't want to come and had spent the past 3 hours staring at my ceiling thinking about what Jun Pyo had said.  
"Do you have any idea how hard it was to carry two girls on my back while trying to avoid falling boulders on my head" Woo Bin asked.  
"Anyways" Woo Bin continued while we walked over to some girls. One was blonde and was wearing a small little red dress. The other one was a red head with cat like eyes and emerald green dress. She gave me a soft smile as her friend nudged her over to my direction.  
"Hi I'm Grace" She said smiling extending her hand out to me.  
"Yi Jeong" I tell her and she simply blushes nodding her head at me.  
"Why don't you guys take a walk" Woo Bin suggested. Taking the hint I nodded and turned to the girl.  
"Let's take a walk" I told her and she was quick to follow me. The silence around us thick and uncomfortable.  
"I'm sorry I really didn't want to be here" She confessed to me.  
"Neither did I"  
"So we were both dragged here by our friends" Grace said smiling.  
"I really don't get the appeal of this place. There's something about it that gives me the chills" She added shaking her head.  
"It's just a hang out" I told her shrugging.  
"There's nothing here but trash" Grace added while they walked along the edges of the creek.  
"It would be a good place to hang out if it wasn't so dirty" I added. The truth was the creek at one point had been clean and some would say beautiful. Now there was nothing but trash floating in the water. Cups of beer, beer bottles, tires, everything and anything that you could think of. The water was murky black and if there ever was any fish they were long gone.  
"I can't believe people come here for. Oh My god! What's that?" Grace asked pointing to something hidden by a pile of old bags floating around it.

*Bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump*

Approaching it cautiously I froze. All I could see was someone's foot. It was covered in blood and their skin was blue. Bruises and cuts surrounded the leg.  
"Go call someone" I managed to say to Grace who nodded running of in Woo Bin and her blonde friends direction. The smell was disgusting. It smelled of decaying flesh and it was hard to breathe. My chest tightened and I felt that same sensation of not being able to breathe. The persons hand was sticking out and there was clear bruising around it. The hand stuck out at an odd angle and there was dry blood. It was only then that I realized that this person had deep gashes across the wrist. Across the arm there was a single word carved into the flesh. **UNWORTHY.**

I couldn't breathe. My own mind flashing to her. Ga Eul. My mind begging that this wasn't her. That I hadn't caused this. There was a bag on her head that was covering her face. She had brown hair her clothes were the same as the last day I saw her. That ugly green turtle neck sweater and those cut up old jeans. Reaching for the bag with shaky hands I moved it away carefully.  
"No…..Ga Eul"  
"Yi Jeong!" Woo Bin yelled while I backed away from the body unable to take it, My mind screaming, my heart thumping wildly and my stomach plummeting a hundred times.  
"It's her"

-

Thank You for reading please leave me a comment about what you think so far.


	3. Chapter 1 part 3 Unworthy (Yi Jeong)

Hey everyone sorry for not writing in 2 weeks I had a little writers block on what would be the next step to this story or at least how the next scenes would play out. Anyways here's the next part of the first chapter and I hope you enjoy it. Also let me know if the wrong names appear again I fix it most of the time but I do miss a few.

_ The water is murky. It smells of filth. The deeper I try to swim the darker it gets and the less I see. _  
_But she keeps going swimming further in and I have to follow. I have to save her. I can once again feel the drumming in my ears *Bump ba-bump,ba-bum* Over and over it continues. I keep squinting my eyes trying to look for her but the water is to dark. I reach my hand out when I think I see her swimming by trying to catch her but she's already to far gone. I try to swim toward her but my arms and feet feel to heavy like a ton of bricks is weighing me down. There's no need to breathe for me because that pain in my chest seems to only grown more until I'm numb and no longer feel anything inside._  
_"Ga Eul" I try to call out but there is no answer. Instead she faces me her body a sickly pale and the words __**UNWORTHY**__ written across her right arm. Her lips are so blue and her flowing chocolate brown hair floats around her. She's no longer wearing that ugly green sweater but a pale yellow dress as she looks at me. Her eyes contain no depth to them. Her expression is blank and yet I can tell the pain I have caused her simply by the damage on her body. _  
_"You did this to me" She says and I know I did but I shake my head anyways as she continues. The pressure inside my chest increasing a thousand times more until I feel I can no longer breathe and I gasp out for air. _  
_"You broke me" She whispers her voice repeating that phrase over and over inside my head until I feel like I've gone mad._

"Yi Jeong We're going to be late for the funeral!" Il Hyun calls out and I sit up from bed running my hands through my hair sweat making the sides of my hair stick to my face slightly.  
"Yi Jeong. Dad's waiting with the guards hurry up" Il Hyun says once again.  
"I'm coming I manage to say" Before Il Hyun leaves. It takes a few minutes for me to collect myself and get ready. The past few days really seemed to shake me up. There was so much that I had learned and so much growing that I did these past few days as human being. How is it possible to mature so much in a matter of days because on one single person? Had I been so caught up in what I was that I forgot to that human part of myself and only used that animalistic instinct inside me?

When we arrive to the town square where the Funeral will be held there is nothing but silence when we pull in. There's a large podium on stage guarded by our finest Nova warriors as my father makes his way on stage. There is a large picture of the girl on stage next to the casket. Her eyes are an olive green color and her hair a soft chestnut color that looks to be the softest of browns. Her name was Angel. In that picture she is not smiling but looking up at the camera and even then I can tell her expression is of sadness. Everywhere I can see hundreds of Nova residents. The people that stand out to me the most aside from my friends who are all at the side their expressions of agony and I can tell that they to have grown because of this. The weeping is unbearable and I find it hard to look at the woman who is clinging to her husband unable to bear the pain of her child being dead. The father filled with grief as he hugs his wife his eyes filled with anger and grief trying to calm his mate and fighting his own turmoil.  
"Today.. We say goodbye to a young life that ended far to early" My father speaks and I can't help but stare at the picture in front of me on stage while looking down at the casqued as my father continues to give his speech.  
Angel was so much like Ga Eul; quiet and a good student. Angel didn't have many friends and was often picked on at school. She attended school a couple cities away from ours where she was ridiculed and bullied by everyone. A few girls of her school though it would be funny to take pictures of the girls while she was changing for P.E in the locker rooms. They posted the pictures online and made sure it circled the school. The girls then got their boyfriends to follow her into the girls bathroom where they proceeded to scare her into believing they'd rape her. They took her into their car blindfolded her, tied her up, and gagged her driving her around town for hours until setting her free inside the woods in our town. Lost she wandered around for hours crying, cold, and afraid. She was able to get out and found herself at Devils creek. The bruises and cuts on her body all coming from her struggle to fight the boys off and making it down to Devils creek. What she thought of in those last moments is something that no one other than she knows. Still..it makes you wonder how much wrong the world still carries for people like her to feel so much pain; and people like me who cause it never thinking of the consequences. They might have not held that knife in their hands but they did guide it toward her heart.  
"We are people of unity. And we must stand together as one. When one of use falls we all do. When one of us suffers we all cry. Today we have lost an innocent soul and I can only pray that she's set free from the confines of her oppression and finally find some peace" My father ends before our warriors begin to growl. The sounds of lions, bears, wolves sounding off echoing out throughout Nova Square. Sending off that lost soul into the heavens offering her a kind farewell and wishing her peace before the casket is carried of by them sent into the wall of sacred souls. It's not often that we bury people here. Father thought someone who has suffered so much deserves the highest honor and guaranteed peace. Only the purest of souls and the bravest of our warriors make it into that wall. Everyone remains silent watching the casket go inside the wall and as soon as it does a beautiful purple flame lights up. Angel's mother begins to weep once the flame is released up into the sky a soft glimmer sparkling above everyone and then disappearing vanishing forever.  
Once everyone began to walk away I could feel someone glaring at me only to find Jan Di's cold eyes looking back at me.  
"She'll come around as soon as they find Ga Eul" Jun Pyo whispers. And I know he's no longer mad at me though if I were him I still would be. Jan Di seems to have come around and forgiven Jun Pyo knowing he had nothing to do with what happened that day. Ga Eul. Where was she? After so long I feared for the worst. Her mother was to ill with grief to speak to anyone including Nova officers. Father had search parties in all our cities trying to find a trace of her. But there was none. Nothing that could possibly indicate she was alright. Even if she was found alive the bitter taste of the previous days would still remain. Someone innocent still died and there would always be someone out there with out their mate. Every time I think about it I realize that whoever Angel's soul mate is will never know who she was. All they'll receive is a picture of who she was and the age that she died. Then they'll be placed with the other unfortunate people who are never to meet their soul mate. They'll find someone to start a life with though they'll never be happy because the love of their life has died.  
From a distance I can hear my father talking to Angels parents once again offering them condolences for their loss and I can see the grief in his wise eyes. When mother left us he was already dead. His mate had died years before. Although he was filled with grief he was still the future king. As king there were duties such as having children and marriage. He was arrange to my mother Narrissa and had Il Hyun and I. There was no doubt our father cared for us and liked our mother there was always that look in his eyes that told us he was not happy. After a while mother left and met someone else her real soul mate. Had she been my fathers soul mate and she had left him he would have died like most soul mates do once they've met and are separated. Being a Nova is a mysterious thing.  
By the time we've arrived home my body feels tired and exhausted wanting to drop on the bed but my mind is still racing a mile a minute the way it always does at night since Ga Eul has gone missing. There's not much I can do but wait for sleep if I can get any and when I do the nightmares only become worse. I can feel it just before sleep tries to succumb me pulling me in as my eye begin to feel heavy I can hear m heart thumping calmly *Bump, ba-bum, bump* All the while my mind seems to be chanting her name. *Ga Eul…. Ga Eul…Ga Eul.* Her name and my heart chanting together in sync while her face flashes before my eyes. Before long I'm already asleep.

_ I can smell it before I can see it. My heart is racing and I can feel the dirt in my paws my heart racing as I run through the forest that is slowly being eaten up by flames. The colors of red dancing in my eyes._  
_"I have to find her.!"_  
_"Find her!" My mind screams. Giant torches of trees begin to fall at my feet as I leap across the burning forest trying to dodge the flames._  
_"Ga Eul!" I yell out to her but my voice is unheard and only a howl of desperation comes out. The flames begin to consume the forest around me faster and I can't seem to find a way out._  
_"Yi Jeong!" I hear her scream out. _  
_"Yi Jeong help me!" She shouts and I know it's her though I've never heard her speak I know it's her. My paws tread faster trying to reach her but I can't see her._  
_"Ga Eul!" I call out to her again. It's almost a flash as I blink and then I am no longer in the woods. No. Instead I am standing in Devils Creek. At the top of the high cliff where I can see the forest being consumed by flames. Swallowed whole by it watching everything collapse around the flames. The trees turning to ash. Like a ticking bomb it burst until there is nothing but ash left. _  
_"No!" I yell _  
_"Yi Jeong!"_

"Yi Jeong! Yi Jeong!"  
"You have to get up man!"  
Waking up startled I find Il Hyun looking up at me his eyes filled with concern and something else that I can't really understand.  
"What's going on?" I ask him.  
"It's Ga Eul" He says and for a second I think my ears are playing tricks on me but his next words stop me cold.  
"We found her. But she's in trouble"

I know it's short but this is mostly for suspense lol next chapter will finally reveal where Ga Eul has been. Also. How would you guys feel if I did a very depressing one shot story about the girl that died Angel.


	4. Chapter 1 part 4 Angels Story

**Hey everyone before you start reading I want to apologize in advance for how depressing the story has been and how depressing this chapter will be. But in order for you to understand some things that will happen in the story you need to read this. Anyways please enjoy.**_  
_

_ Taking your last breath should be easy. It should be carefree. Filled with peace. Why is it that my last moments are filled with loneliness and fear… I feel so cold and afraid. Everything around me feels like it's crushing me into an abyss of darkness. Sinking further and further down into an endless hole of nothingness… Why?_

My life wasn't always like this. I had friends, a family that cared about me. Love. I though that was reachable for a person like me. Somehow life has hit me to believe otherwise. When you look at those models on television you see nothing but perfection. Beautiful, blonde skinny, Gorgeous blue eye. Me. I'm nothing like those girls. There's nothing beautiful about me. This moment is where it's all proven to me.

"Angel you're going to be late for school sweetie." My mother calls out.

"Coming" I say fixing my back pack on my shoulder. Looking at myself in the mirror I can't help but have a Princess Diaries moment. My chestnut hair is tied into a tight bun. I'm wearing a long skirt that runs down to my ankles and a turtle neck white sweater.

"Well this is as good as it's going to get" I say quoting Princess Diaries. I don't know why I dress like this knowing the world that I live in. Maybe it's because these close make me feel safe and warm. Maybe it's the fact that my family lives on a small budget. Sighing I simply run downstairs and take an apple from the counter before heading off to school. Golden Iris High School.

The school hallways are always boxing with noise. People laugh and they talk about their weekends or the plans they have for the holidays. Not me. When I walk in the first people I see are Jeremy and Solar. My two best friends that never really were. We grew up together; spending summer at each others houses eating melted popsicle sticks from our hands. How could everything change? When you're a child you're led to believe in only innocence. But the world is corrupted with hate and violence. When you grow up you can be part of the good or you can choose to be part of the bad. I chose good and they chose the wrong direction.

"Hi Pizza face" Jeremy says and I have to look away trying to block out the words that have already circled my head hundreds of times. Why do they have to point out the flaws in me? Don't they realize I already see that part inside me?

"Hi Angie" Solar says her tone condescending that it makes me look down at the ground making me want to dig a hole inside the ground and never come out.

"Stop it!" I want to shout. Why do you want to hurt me? We use to be best friends. Has life really pushed us apart so much that you hate me?

_What satisfaction do you get from picking on me? What can you possibly gain from it? Good or bad everything has a cause and effect. Do people really realize the hurt they do when the pick on someone? _

"So listen we're having a party at my house this weekend. Why don't you come and hang out?" Solar asks.

"She wouldn't be into it right? I mean there is going to be actual people there not books" Jeremy says his tone making me feel stupid but I try and walk away.

"She was talking to you Angela!" Jeremy snaps.

"Let me go Jeremy" I say though my voice sounds week.

"Why can't you just leave me alone. Please" I say pathetically.

"Come on Jer. Let's go to class" Angela says taking his hand and smiling at him before they head off to class. For a moment I see Jeremy looking at me something flashing in his eyes that I can't describe but it's there. Since we were kids we'd always been so close. He and I. More so then Solar. The thing was that Solar changed. She became popular gradually changing her image she was always beautiful. Blonde, blue eyes, model like body. She had what everyone whished. She always liked Jeremy even if he wasn't for her in this Nova world. She got him. I never understood why he chose her. He was never for appearances. He hated girls like Solar the most. Somehow things changed. One afternoon we were together the next we weren't.

_If only things had really changed. You know gotten back to normal. But things never work out the way you plan. Do they?…._

"Come on Angel we're going to be late for our next class." Stephanie said.

"I'll be right there I just need to finish changing and I'll be out" I said getting my clothes out from my locker.

"Alright I'll see you there" Stephanie said smiling at me before leaving. She was one of the only friends I had. I met her in my English class a few months back. She just moved here from England and we get along just fine. She's quiet like me but she's pretty and has a boyfriend and more people that like her. She has dark hair and big green cat like eyes and a smile that makes you want to be her friend instantly.

Looking at the clock I see that I have about 7 minutes to head to class so I begin to undress taking off my shirt and my shorts to change back into my clothes. It's a faint sound but I can hear the door off the locker room close. There's pounding on the lockers around me though I can't see anything when I look around.

"Is someone there?" I ask.

*Click*

There's a large flash the blinds me and when my eyes adjust again and I squint I see Solar standing there with the rest of her cheer leader friends.

"His Angie" She says and before I can do anything two of her friends come from behind me and grab me by my arms.

"What are you doing?" I manage to say though my voice is filled with fear.

"Don't worry. I'm not going to hit you" Solar says her tone teasing as if she were talking to a baby.

"Hold her down Jess" She says to one of her friends who's holding on to my arms. The girl nods and her grip in my arm tightens as does the other girls and I know there's going to be bruising afterwards.

"We are going to have a little photo shoot. Called Freak show out of her natural habitat" Solar says

*Click, Click , Click*

With each Click the flashes begin to blind me and I try to hide my face and struggle out of their grasp but I can't. I can't hear anything but the click sounding off in my head like a large bell over and over as the flash of the camera continues to blind me. I can hear her friends laughing and I fight hard for the tears that sting my eyes not to fall. I have to set myself free somehow.

"Come on do it Stacy!" I hear Solar shout before the two girls let go of my arms letting me free of their grasp.

*Splash!*

I feel cold and sticky and when I look down I'm covered in yellow paint.

"Beautiful!" Solar shouts laughing

*Click, Click, Click*

I feel my knees give out and I can't stop the tears from flowing down my face and I start to sob.

"Awe how cute she's crying" Solar says while her friends laugh.

"Please stop" I hear myself say but she doesn't. She continues to take pictures but it's not only her anymore. Her friends have all taken their cell phones out and began to take pictures and probably take video. I can hear their laughs echoing out in my head but I can't seem to stand up. it's almost as if I'm being taken to hell to re live this moment over and over and it won't stop playing. Making me re live this never ending cycle.

"Hey! What are you doing!" I hear coach Reynolds yell. I can hear them running but I know no one will do anything. They never do. When their gone I manage to get up my knees shake as I do so. I can hear the coach telling me something but it's as if I've gone deaf to everything else but the echoing laughter inside my head. Coach Reynolds is taking me to the showers and I can see the way the yellow paint blends with the water swirling around the drain before leaving. That's me. The way everything around me causes chaos like tornado wanting to pull me in into a dark hole until I can't scream or fight.

"You'll be okay. I'll call your parents" Coach Reynolds tells me after I've changed and we're inside her office. But there's nothing she can do that can make this stop. The teachers pretend it's not happening and the principal cares more about the reputation of the school I've seen it happen many times before.

I don't wait for her to call them I simply get up and leave. I don't feel like going to class. Not today. So I simply walk out. No one says anything to me. No one is guarding the school I don't know how I get home only that when I do my mom is waiting there for me but I can't talk to her. I can't tell her how lonely and empty I feel inside. How peoples ridicule seems to cut deep inside my heart and soul. I don't want her to hurt for me to. I don't want her to feel like I've disappointed her in some way.

"I don't want to talk about it" I hear myself say before going up to my room. I lay my bag down on the ground and make my way to my bed clutching a pillow toward my chest as silent tears fall.

_Why?…_

Have you ever felt ridiculed. Like the entire world is looking down upon you laughing. I have.

I knew I had to go back to school eventually and I did after a week. You'd think this would blow over eventually but it didn't. All anyone did was laugh at me. It was like watching a movie in slow motion where the beautiful girl walks by and everyone wants to look at her. They smile and the stare while some guy passes by and trips or hits his face in a locker while she walks. If only that had been the result I got. My welcoming was worse then anything I could have imagined.

It was as if everyone had been waiting to welcome me. As soon as my feet hit the hall everything seemed to suddenly come to life. There were posters and flyers stamped around the school halls with my pictures on them. I could hear everyone laughing and whispering about me.

"Nice body pizza face!" Someone shouted.

"I can bare it" I told myself continuing to walk toward my locker. I just needed to get through this. When I reached my locker I felt like crying. Not only because I was upset but there was also in front of my locker was a picture of me in my undergarments crying and covered in yellow paint with the caption

"**Welcome Back Loser!**" Written across it. I didn't have to guess because I knew who was doing this.

"You know" I heard Solar say so I turned to look at her while she was standing across from my locker with her friends Jessica and Stacy.

"Yellow really is your color. Don't you think?" She asked her tone condescending while her friends laughed. Walking away I could hear her laughing at me but I didn't care. I just needed to get through the day and things would be fine.

"One day at a time Angel" I chanted in my head.

"Angel!"

"Angel!"

I could hear him calling me and I knew who it was. Jeremy. But I wasn't going to stop. I wasn't going to let him further ridicule me and make this day get far worse.

"Angel! Wait" He says and before I can do anything he's already standing in front of me. His green eyes looking down at me like great olive pools there's something flickering in his eyes but I can't tell anymore what it is.

"Please just hear me out okay" Jeremy says. He's standing in front of me wearing a letterman jacket again and I can't seem to look at him. I hate what he represents to me now. I can't stand looking.

"What do you want Jeremy?" I manage to say my voice firm and soft at the same time that if feel unfamiliar to my own ears.

"Are you okay?" He asks his voice soft and for a second I find myself scoffing as a tear rolls down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly knowing that if I don't he'll laugh at me.

"Good Bye Jeremy" I say trying to walk away but he doesn't let me and instead takes hold of my arm.

"Look I'm sorry okay. I didn't know Solar was going to do that to you." Jeremy said.

"Please just leave me alone. What do you want from me?" I questioned tears stinging my eyes once more. For a second he looks into my eyes wanting to search for something that I can't understand and I can see tears in his own eyes.

"I just. I got carried away by all of it. Okay. Solar offered me something that seemed like a good deal. I don't know who I am anymore" He said leaning against the wall his jaw tight as he tried to contain his own tears.

"But I know it's not this." He spoke.

"Look I'm sorry this happened and I know we can't be friends anymore because of what I've done so I won't ask that you forgive me either. Just let me make things right" He tells me. For the first time I can see it in his eyes again. After so long. It's like we're back to point A again; back to his porch outside on a Sunday afternoon after Solar has left and we're sitting there quietly watching the fireflies glow like small lanterns in the sky. Floating away and making the earth feel far more magical than it actually is.

"What are you doing? Get away from her!" Stephanie says.

"I'll make it up to you. I promise" He says before walking away.

"You okay?" Stephanie asks her eyes concerned.

"Yeah" I says to her wiping away the stray tears that have fallen down my face before we head to class.

I try to ignore the stares, the laughter, and the mocking words of everyone. Finally the teacher gets everyone to settle down. Still, I can't seem to relax knowing that everyone is whispering about me. Halfway through the period I can hear screaming outside. It's only when I hear two distinct voices that I know Solar and Jeremy are arguing. It's muffled but everyone grows silent trying to strain their ears to listen. Smashing of lockers is heard. The way a body hits metal and Mr. Stewart eventually steps out. Gradually everyone follows and somehow I find myself in that crowd simply because Stephanie had dragged me out with the rest of the class and I can't help but gasp at the sight in front of me. Novas all around. Bears, lions, Hyena's, Tigers, Leopards all surrounding a single tiger. He growls and tries to fight back while all the others attack him. All I have to do is look at those green olive eyes and I know it's Jeremy. Finally Mr. Stewart Steps in a large Lion and roars splitting the group of attackers away from Jeremy who's almost unconscious as he shifts back to a human. Mr. Stewart gives another roar and they seem to walk away their looks feral and angry not wanting to leave their pray just yet. Wanting to give the final blow. A couple of guys from our class pick Jeremy up and carry him to the nurse's office while Mr. Stewart follows. When Jeremy passes by me his eyes meet mine and I know it's his way of apologizing. From a distance I can see Solar glaring at me before she walks away.

The next few days are quiet. People seem to forget all about me and focus on Jeremy. He's been gone for a few days and won't be back until next week. He has a broken leg that needs surgery and won't be back until after. Solar has stopped glaring and I think I can walk the halls again being invisible. That makes me feel secure again. Like I can walk along the halls with my head held high and no one will say anything to me except for a hello. The day goes by smoothly and I'm happy when I'm walking down the hall at the end of the day. The halls are peaceful simply because everyone rushes out of school. But I don't, I take my time and I like to believe that this is the way I walk in everyday. No whispers, no laughter just peace. I leave a few things in my locker before heading toward the exit but before I reach it I'm grabbed from behind and my mouth is covered by what feels like a piece of cloth. I can hear laughter and someone covers my eyes with a tie maybe a scarf. I can't scream because my mouth is gagged but my heart is racing a mile a minute while fear shakes inside me. I can feel them tie my hands up before I'm picked up thrown over someone's shoulder.

"In here" I hear a female voice say and I don't have to guess who it is because I know it's Solar. I try to struggle but all they do is laugh. I'm afraid and I can't help but fluster around when I feel I'm being dropped. they've placed me somewhere cold. But soft I don't know where I am only that I'm afraid.

"This is going to teach you not to get in my way" Solar says before I feel a harsh slap across my face. I can hear laughter before she walks away and tears are already flowing down my eyes though no sound is heard simply because my mouth is gagged.

"You know what to do" She tells them and I can hear hollering of males.

"So who want to go first" Someone says and I can hear footsteps coming over as one of them kisses my cheek and I flinch away flailing around trying to hide.

"Awe she's scared" One of the says before I'm picked up.

"Hold her down" One of them says. I struggle but there's nothing I can do. Nothing I can say. I can feel his disgusting lips on me. He bites harshly at my neck and I can't stop crying. I'm so afraid. His hands are on my body and as much as I want to scream, beg for him to stop he doesn't.

"We're all going to have some fun tonight" He tells me. His words sending horrific chills down my entire body that I begin to flail around further. Thrashing as much as I can trying to kick him even though my feet are also tied together. He laughs and then he hits me. His fist colliding into my eye. I want to scream out in pain and beg for someone to help me.

"Stay still" He says while he lifts up my skirt.

"Stop! Please! Please!" I want to scream.

"I can't take it anymore please!" My mind screams. I hear laughter and then he lets me go. They all do. I'm left shaking in fear. I know I should be relieved but I'm more terrified then I was before. There going to kill me I know it. I feel a large hand grab my hair harshly no longer being in a bun after so much struggling.

"You know what" His voice says.

"You're not even worth it" He says before his friends laugh and I'm picked up again. Once more I thrash around.

"Why Isn't anyone helping me" My mind screams.

"Put her in the back" I hear before I'm tossed inside cold metal. I can hear the entire of a car roar and I know I'm in the back of someone's truck. Their all laughing blasting their music as loud as they can. I can't hear a word they say but I'm terrified. Where are they taking me? I can't move because I'm still tied down. He's driving so harshly that I'm being thrown in several directions and I keep bumping into things that I can't see.

_Have you ever given up. Given up on trying. You fight and you fight and what for? For who? I couldn't keep doing it anymore. I couldn't keep kidding myself.._

I had no more tears. They seemed t simply dry out. My body ached from everything. My heart felt heavy and I was tired. I just wanted it to stop. I was so scared. I felt like they've been driving for days. They didn't stop and I could hear their laughter. I couldn't fight. I couldn't get free. I didn't understand why this was happening to me. All I ever wanted was to be accepted. But even I couldn't accept myself.

"We're letting you out" I heard when the car stopped and then I was picked up by someone. I was carried for a good few hours the air felt different and I was afraid.

"Solar wanted us to kill you. But even she's not worth all that. So we're letting you go" One of them said before they set me down. My shoes had been long gone and I felt soft grass on my feet before they untied them.

"We're going to play a little game" One of them said.

"you're going to run. And if we find you..well I think you know what's going to happen." He said.

"You better get a head start we haven't hunted in a while I kind of want to feel the dirt in my paws again don't you guys?" He said while the rest laughed.

"Oh. And another thing" He said removing the blind fold.

"Don't look back" He whispered before pushing me forward. I didn't know why or how but I managed to find my footing before I could fall and my feet seemed to move on their own. I needed to run so I did.

I could feel rocks, thorns and branches cutting into my feet but I couldn't stop running I knew I just needed to get away. My heart was racing and there was a pounding inside my ears that told me they were behind me. I couldn't stop. I couldn't look back. I just needed to run. The trees around me seemed to blur past me as I did. I wasn't until I tripped and I felt both my knees sting from the ricocheting motion that I began to sob. I shook as I hugged my knees close. My feet didn't seem to want to move.

"Please somebody help me!" I cried

"Anyone please"

_But no one ever came. No one ever did. I was like a curse I had to live with. Over and over my life continued to spiral downwards. I was so alone so afraid. I needed and out…_

I knew it was cold but I couldn't feel it. I don't know how I managed to get up but I did. My body felt numb and though my feet were covered in blood. My arms bruised and scraped from falling I kept walking.

"I need to go" I heard someone say.

"I need to find it" She said her voice lost and filled with sorrow.

My feet stopped only when I reached the edge of a large cliff. I looked down and it seemed to invite me. Everything around it seemed dead. There was no beauty down there. The lake seemed murky with darkness.

There was no green grass, no beautiful flowers, no beautiful lake everything was dead.

Death. The word seemed so beautiful. I wanted to be part of that beauty. My body was no longer willing to fight and my soul was ready to give in.

"Free" She said again.

If I were to fall from here. Jump into the river would I reach it? Would it pull me inside it's warmth and make me apart of it's darkness.

The road down was bumpy I knew it but I managed to go down. With a few scrapes and almost falling a few times. My body being hurt more the further down I went.

"It'll be fine. I'll be with you soon" She said again as I looked at the lake which was now only a few feet away from me. I walked to it as it called me. Telling me to join it. Whispering in my ear.

"Death is beautiful" She said again my hand reaching out. This time I looked down at my feet as I felt the cool dark water hitting it. There was a large gash in the middle of my foot now. But I could not feel the pain. It was gone now. The water though dark cleansing me. Starting to consume me and take me with it. I reached down to take the glass out. It was a beautiful green shine. Sparkling in the night.

"You're unworthy" She whispered to me again.

"No one will love you. And he's never going to find you"

"Let death take you. Let it make you beautiful and at peace" She tells me.

"Unworthy" She whispers and it's almost like my body is no longer mine but hers. She keeps chanting that word as the broken glass moves to my arm. It should hurt but it doesn't. I don't feel anything as blood spurs down my arm.

"Unworthy" She says again.

"I want to be beautiful" She says before the broken glass is placed across my wrist drawing a perfect red line across it and then moving to the other and doing the same. I drop the glass at my side and my heart thumps slower.

"Come with me" The lake seems to say as I walk further inside. My head feeling light before. So I lay down looking down at the water. It's so dark so beautiful. For a few more seconds I can feel the peace and then like a blast of fresh air I can breathe for just one more moment and the worries once again fill me up. Jeremy, Stephanie, My parents, even Solar. My heart continues to slow and I can feel the dark hole pushing me further down.

Taking your last breath should be easy. It should be carefree. Filled with peace. Why is it that my last moments are filled with loneliness and fear… I feel so cold and afraid. Everything around me feels like it's crushing me into an abyss of darkness. Sinking further and further down into an endless hole of nothingness…

_Just like that I was gone…_

The world around me could not see me. It was almost as if I was never really there. I left no mark on the world and I was gone. I was invisible. For a few days I wondered around the forest in my new form. I was nothing and yet I was there. I wasn't afraid and even though I had wanted peace I could not find it. Time no longer seemed to matter to me. It seemed to be irrelevant to someone like me almost as if it no longer existed to people such as me. I only knew that 2 days had gone by before people began to come to this lake. No one seemed to notice my body. No one came close enough to the lake to see me. Then again everything that was floating inside the lake made it hard to notice me. There was a party and I could hear people laughing, talking, drinking, some were even engaged in sexual actions. None of them could see me. My eyes go toward the cliff and I can see a large brown wolf come down. He's alone unlike the other Novas all of them coming down with someone. One of them came with 2 girls even. He shift back to his human form and quickly changes in the bushes before coming down. His friend happens to be the Nova with the 2 girls. He introduces him to the girls but when I see his eyes I can tell he's different. There's sincerity in them and warmth and for a second my mind flashes back to that moment with Jeremy. His friend pushes him to talk to the red headed girl Grace her name is.

"Yi Jeong" He says to her. It seems familiar somehow but I can't really register it clearly in my head.

. They walk away and for some reason I can't help but follow him. I can tell there's something on his mind and there's a clear sadness in his heart. He seems to be fine pretending it's okay. Mostly because the girl with him doesn't notice. They walk toward the lake and I know where there headed. Towards my body. Their talking about this place at first and the girl is the first to notice me.

"What's that she asks?" Her voice afraid.

His expression seems to flash with fear maybe guilt as he looks at me.

"Go call someone" He tells her before she runs off and he's left to look at me. He moves closer to my body reaching out to see me. When he does his eyes flash with to many emotions for me to catch but the biggest one I can see flashing over and over in his eyes is guilt.

"Ga Eul" He says and for a moment I wonder who she is. I can see sadness in his eyes as he looks at me. Almost as if he knows who I am and can feel my pain. His kind eyes tell me I should go with him so I do. I follow him home leaving my body after police are called. It's only when he's home that I realize I'm inside the Nova Kings home.

"Prince Yi Jeong" I say in realization.

He doesn't say much when he gets home only there's extreme sadness in his eyes. The King doesn't say anything to him only that he will go an talk to my parents. I don't want to go. I don't want to see them right now. I'm not ready to face what I've done. Not to them. Not yet. I'm far to afraid. I realize then that I'm only a few towns away from my own. I don't want to hear my mother cry or watch my father suffer in silence. I can't. I know this is what I've done to them. This is what I've left them. Nothing but suffering and I can't bare to watch. For the next few days I stay with the Prince. I go to school with him and I follow. I learn a lot about his life. More importantly I learn about her. Ga Eul.

I learn what he's done to her. I learn who she was. How afraid he is that he's lost her and the guilt that he feels to have caused her so much pain, how much he cares about her.

When my funeral comes I feel strange. There's so many things I've though about since I've been with the Prince. I look at him and I wonder about my own soul mate. Not only have I caused grief to the people that cared about me but I've forever forsaken myself and my mate. The Funeral is beautiful and The King has given me the highest honor and the most beautiful way to be taken from this world given only to the purest souls and the bravest warriors of the Nova world. I look at my mother as she weeps for me. Clinging to my father who's eyes hold an unbearable pain.

"I'm sorry" I say to them though I know they can't hear me. I can see Stephanie and she's standing next to Jeremy. Both of them are silently crying as well. I don't know what's happened but looking at them I can't help but smile because somehow this all seems right for them. I can hear the roars of our people sending me off my spirit already flowing towards the wall of sacred souls. Just like that I am taken away flown into the beautiful white purity of peace and I am no longer invisible but a beautiful color of purple. I can see it the way to which all the souls are. They call out to me wanting to join them but when I look down to the earth I can see him. The Prince. His suffering for me, for her. I can see the lines that connect. A soul to a soul I can see Stephanie and Jeremy as one connecting together while other souls simply carry empty colorful lines sending them off in different directions. The Prince is standing there his eyes filled with pain, worry, and guilt. I can see his line of fate miles and miles away.

"I'll find her for you" I tell him though I know he can't hear.

"For both us" I think as I float above the skies.

**Thank you for reading. Also I want to say that suicide is never the answer and please get help and talk to someone if you are being bullied at school. More importantly you should know that things eventually do get better. Also I promise that this story will get less depressing after I finish posting all the parts of my first chapter. Again thank you for reading and please comment. I will post Ga Eul's Chapter by the end of this week hopefully. **


	5. Ch 1 part 5 Watch the little Girl Burn

Hey everyone before I start I want to thank everyone for continuing to read my story I really apreciate it. This is the first poem I'm doing here it's called **The World as She See's it**. I'm not a poet so I apologize if you do not like it and if it has mistakes but like I said this story is based of one I wrote with original character called Lyric and Parker. Which is why you'll often see other names. Lol. Anyways please enjoy this chapter.

_ How long have I been here? Under this cold night filled with darkness. Maybe a few days, weeks, months, even years. I can't help but think that I might be going crazy stuck inside of this small room. He has me trapped here. I don't understand why? An yet.. At the same time I know his reasoning. He hates me. How could my own father hate me? How could he look at me and feel a disgrace? I can hear the soft breeze pick up from outside. The small window that was once in my basement is now gone. Sealed shut by a large piece of wood and metal bars. All I can do is hug my knees close to myself trying to give me some warmth. My body is covered in bruises. Not that it isn't normal for it to be. This time my face is no longer left alone. He has me in here trapped now. He can hit me anywhere he wants, as hard as he wants because no one will see me. No one will ever see me again. I'm afraid to look at my own reflection. To see what's been done to my face. I can hardly open my eyes and my mouth is covered in dry blood. I can't scream, I can't cry. What's the point if no one can hear me? So I write._

The world is cold and dark.

The light seems to fade with each day that goes on.

Her soul begins to die letting her insides fester.

Slowly the world around becomes numb.

She walks around with the weight of the world on her shoulders.

Hugging herself tightly trying to find warmth.

She lingers her gaze forever on the ground.

For her, there is no heaven only hell.

There is no light only darkness.

Her world begins to decay.

Her life begins to slowly close up.

The walls inside begin to crumble.

The life inside her loosing it's light.

She lives her life among the living.

But she is already dead inside.

The world around her brings no happiness.

To her river of death.

The tears never fall.

There is no release to grieve.

Her life is but a dark canvas.

There's nothing left to see.

Her body is frail as she walks on this earth.

There's no one to turn to in this dark shallow world.

The people around they stop and they stare.

Never once do they stop to ask if she's well.

They point and they whisper about the broken girl.

Never once reaching out to her.

The world is cruel and lonely.

The world is frivolous and vain.

Caring only of themselves and ignoring others pain.

So she walks alone once more

Hoping, praying for someone anyone

To give her some hope.

_ I can hear it like a screeching whisper that hurts my ears. My heart begins to thump harder in my chest. As much as I try to shut my eyes as tightly as I can hoping that this is all just a nightmare. It isn't. It will never be. I can hear his drunken footsteps as he makes his way down and I know he's coming to get me. At that moment all I can think about is why this is happening. Even before I was born fate had so cruelly decided this path for me. This is what happens to Novas who lose their mates long before they even find them. This is the pain they carry deep inside. The self loathing they have for themselves. And the poison they spill out to their families. This is what he's brought to my mother, to me; hell. He doesn't come in this time merely seems to be passing by and then I hear it. Those tortured screams of my mother that shake my every core. She begs and she cries pleading for him to stop. I can already feel tears in my eyes and all I can do is cover my ears to try and shake her screams out of my head. These screams haunt my nightmares every single night. His voice and his evil penetrating eyes seem to torture me and I can't help but feel like the walls cave in pulling me further into the darkness._

"_Please stop! Please!" I can hear her scream and before I know it I'm sobbing along with her pleading as well. Knowing that he can't hear me._

"_Somebody please!" I beg._

_I think of Jan Di knowing how strong she is, how weak I am. How much I want to break out of this place, take my mother with me and never look back. I think of Jun Pyo who's always beside Jan Di. I want them to save me. I want someone to help me. But I know deep in my heart that no one will come. No one will rescue me because it's pointless and I'm worth nothing to anyone. Hours go by but they feel like days until I can no longer hear her scream and I know he's done with her and it's only a matter of time until he comes for me. I no longer feel so much pain. _

_ I feel weak and I've been starved since I've been here getting fed only scraps once a week maybe even less. Surviving only on tap water from my small sink. My body feels heavy and it's hard to move. My body seems to constantly be shaking from lack of everything. Though my body seems to have given up I have to keep clinging on to the small string of hope that I have. Inside my mind keeps screaming to give up. "No one will find you" "No One Cares about you"; but my heart is the only thing that tells me to continue. It's pitch black in here there is no light whatsoever. Nothing that can light up this room. Nothing that can give me hope because I know my chances of surviving this are little to none. He said he was tired of me; of my mother. Of this life with us. We were the wrong people to be with. I know my mother regrets choosing him after she was told her soul mate died. But she wanted children. She wanted a family. She wanted love. _

"_Love." There was that word again. Something that everyone wanted. In my world where most people were lucky to find it. Was I worthy f it? Did I feel like it was possible for someone to love a girl like me? No. My tears kept flowing the more I thought about love. If I were to die tonight would anyone miss me? Would he think about me? Would he care? Or would I leave behind nothing? I needed to know. I needed an answer._

"_Please" I begged. _

"_Anything"_

_Bells. Soft shimmering bells. I could hear then softly almost as if there was magic surrounding them. Wiping my tears away I saw it. It was glowing a soft small little glowing purple orb. It was beautiful. Lighting up the room filling it with light and pushing the darkness away from me. I could feel more tears in my eyes because I knew what this was. Not only was this a sign from the Nova heavens. But this was my proof. Nova spirits don't come down to help unless they have a purpose for doing so._

"_Who sent you?" I wanted to ask but the small purple Nova orb simply stayed by my side._

"_It's going to be okay" I whispered to myself as the orb landed in my open hands. It was like having air. There was nothing. I couldn't feel it. I could only see it. Could this person hear me? I didn't know._

"_Thank you" I whispered before the door burst open and just like that it was gone._

His eyes were menacing. Filled with rage. I knew there was nothing but hate in those evil eyes. That's when I saw it. In his hand he had a gallon of gasoline. And I knew what he was going to do.

"Tonight we're going to die" He said to me causing my heart to stop for a moment before it began to thump wildly. It felt as though my heart would jump out of my chest while my stomach dropped.

"We're going to see how long you can survive" He said to me as he began to drop gasoline all around the room dropping it on my mattress on the floor while I tried to scurry away only for him to grab me by my hair.

"How interesting would it be to see you burn" He said before letting go forcibly throwing me across the room. I can feel my knees sting from hitting the hard concrete of the basement floor but I can't manage to get up. He throws gasoline on the walls surrounding me with it in a circle while I struggled to get up.

"Your mother didn't last long. Not after what I did" He says smiling his words slurring as he speaks.

"Let's make sure you can't escape either" He says before I feel a harsh punch making my head bounce back so hard. I can feel the sting of his fist instantly and the blood inside my mouth to. I can't seem to find my feet while he laughs. I manage to sit up weakly my body shaking as I crawl away from him.

"Let's begin shall we" He says taking a lighter out of his pocket. He grips it tightly in his hand as it comes to life with a flame.

"Die" He says before tossing the lighter into the gasoline. Like a quick gust of wind it begins to light a fire. Spurring across the room while his laughter echoes across the room.

"Please don't let his voice be the last thing I hear" I plead in my head. I try to move away to back away from the growing angry flames that are now behind me as well. I can see it. He's gone so mad his eyes are no longer of any color except pitch black. There is no depth in them only darkness. He begins to shake and I can see it. The transformation. He jumps landing on his four paws. A large black old wolf is growling at me. It's mouth foaming and it's eyes dark with rage. He seems to be saying something but I can't tell. He tries to swipe his paw at me but I manage to avoid it backing away only for my right shoulder to hit the flames. My flesh burns with the flames. I scream in pain while the wolf howls. I move away trying to avoid the flames that are now circling around me just like my father is now. Awaiting to capture me trapping me like a prey. He pounces as does the flames and I close my eyes awaiting for the pain. Not knowing which death would be less painful but wishing for it. I don't hear the door burst open when it does I only hear a harsh smash and the walls cave in. When I finally do open my eyes my father is trying to get up and he's been smashed against the wall the flames still burning while I lay there unable to move. I hear a feral growl and I turn my head. He's standing there a large chocolate brown wolf. Tall, large but young. They both growl as my father gets up shaking off the attack while he stands up. He's much taller than the other wolf and for a second I wonder if their going to kill me together. But then he turns to look at me and I can't help but feel unafraid of his eyes. They circle around each other growling before they attack. There's so much going on that I can't help but feel lightheaded. I can no longer breathe my tired body finally gives out and I fall. I hear a painful howl before darkness consumes me.

_I'm floating. Deep within the beautiful sky. It's waiting for me. I want to reach it. I'm so close to it. So close to peace. So close to happiness. I outstretch my hand trying to reach it only to feel life kick back in and I fall. I scream flailing around trying to grasp a string of hope to keep me here. But there's nothing here for me._

"Your going to be okay I promise"  
His voice is soft. I can feel a body pressed against mine. It's warm and comfortable. I can smell the after fire on his skin. My eyes feel heavy but I open them. Penetrating brown eyes. Dark hair. Yi Jeong.

"_No. Please"_

"_Please don't hurt me"_

"_Please. Don't say anything"_

"_please"  
_

_There he was. So Yi Jeong. The guy that could see past all my walls. The one that knew how ugly I was inside. How unworthy of anything I felt. I couldn't move. As much as I tried my body was far to weak._

_All along he had been right. He had known the truth about how worthless I truly was. And now he had seen this. Seen all of me. Seen through my eyes everything that I had hidden. I had to look away from him. I couldn't do it anymore. He knew everything now. He knew what I was. He knew all of it. Why was fate so cruel to me?_

Thank you for reading the next part of the 1st Chapter will be put up sometime next week. I posted 2 this week because I needed to explain Angels Story. Next chapter will be in Yi Jeong's point of view again.


	6. Ch1 Part 6 I Will Rescue You (Yi Jeong)

Hey Everyone before I Start I want to apologize for not posting anything in a while I've had a lot going on. I do have an announcement to make so I'll just say it. The Poems that I was going to feature in this story will only be mentioned by title from here. The reason for that is that I decided to make it into a small book called Amateur Dark Poetry From A Living Soul. It will be out on Amazon soon so I'll let you guys know when it's out. Anyways thank you for reading here is the next part of the first chapter.

*Beep, Beep, Beep*

She's so weak. So fragile. The girl I had wanted to break so bad was now laying in front of me. Her hair is gently sticking to her sides. Her face looks so pale. There's so many bruises on her face, arms and legs. Her entire body bares the tortures that life had hit her with. I shut my eyes to prevent tears from falling wondering just how broken her soul is. I don't need to wonder how much of that pain I have caused her because I know the truth to it. I want to touch her. To hold her hand and make her fell better but every time I try to reach out to her that bandage around her right shoulder stops me.

"I've cursed her. Everything that's happened to her has all been my fault"

I know it's irrational of me to think that way but I know that whatever hell she's going through I've only added to it.

"What are you doing here Yi Jeong!"

Before he knows it he's being slammed into the wall harshly by Jan Di I know it should hurt. I know I should be in pain but I feel nothing. I can only focus on Ga Eul and the guilt I'm feeling. I won't forget that look. The way she looked at me….

_"She's in trouble"_

_Those had been the only words needed for him to run out of his room and out the front door of the mansion. His instinct took over him everything in his body telling him he needed to rescue her. He Didn't know where he was going only that his heart was racing and he felt an urge of protection with each leap he took in his wolf form. It was like his head and his heart were in sync both chanting her name over and over._

_"Ga Eul, Ga Eul, Ga Eul"_

_The streets were filled with people some screamed and moved out of the way but he didn't care. All he wanted to do was save her. He doesn't know which direction to go along the streets but his heart tells him to go left so he does. It's almost like in his dream he can smell it. Gasoline burning and then he can see a small tattered house being consumed by flames. He can see a woman upstairs and jumps on the roof avoiding the flames as he smashes into the window. The woman is covered in bruises their's blood at the corner of her mouth and at the top of her right eyebrow. Her chocolate brown hair and eyes remind him of Ga Eul and he knows she is the girls struggles up and all Yi Jeong can do is lean closer to her to help the woman up._

_"Please. You have to help her. My daughter. She's downstairs please" The woman struggles to say. He doesn't know how he does it only that he manages to get the woman on his back and leap out of the burning house with her getting her to safety. _

_"Where? Where is she?" He wants to say but he knows she can't hear him. Though somehow she manages it understand. _

_"The basement. Please. Save her" The woman pleads. He doesn't think twice before going back into the burning house. He take sin the appearance of it ; dirty and reeking of alcohol. The empty bottles around him begin to pop from the heat. But It's that blood curdling scream that awakens him to the reality of that nightmare. He can see the flames already swallowing the door but he doesn't care. Instead he burst through it ignoring the pain that he should feel only concentrating on her. When he finally does see her he doesn't have time to take her in only to act. Their's a much larger older black wolf in front of her. He doesn't seem to notice me and neither does she but I can hear him._

_"Worthless people like you deserve to die. Even if you are my daughter." He says before he get's ready to pounce on her. I don't think twice before attacking him. We're both thrown against the wall smashing through it and I try to shake the pain off. _

_"Who are you" He growls out to me. In that moment Ga Eul opens her eyes. I know she can't understand me but I want her to know it's okay._

_Her eyes meet mine for the first time but I don't have time to think about it. Not now. Instead I turn my attention back to him. He's much older and stronger than I am, that much I'm aware of. _

_"I can hold my own in a fight" I tell myself. We circle around each other growling and I hope I can find a way to take him down as fast as I can. The walls are almost completely being swallowed by the flames._

_"If I die today and you live I'll feel a lot better" I say to myself thinking of Ga Eul and knowing she won't be able to hold on much longer. The old wolf seems to be seizing me up to. Getting ready to attack. _

_We pounce at the same time and I find myself letting instincts take in. There's a strong urge deep inside that tells me I have to win. Telling me that I have to protect her. He strikes with his large paw breaking my right shoulder. I cry out in pain as I fall._

_"Did you honestly think a pup like you could beat me?" The older wolf gloats._

_"I'll just kill you first. The flames will take care of her" He says and that's when I turn to look at her._

_Ga Eul. She's no longer conscious and the flames are about to take her in._

_"No" I think as I close my eyes. I can feel him close to me ready to attack._

_"Good bye pup" He says and that's when I attack striking him down with my left paw. He falls down the wall caving in on him and the fire taking his life._

_"Ga Eul"_

_I don't have much time. I know this house is going to fall soon. Somehow I manage to carry her on my back. The flames now surrounding us with no way out. The walls now caving in._

_"I'm not letting you die like this" I tell her before I leap forward jumping past the flames back out from where I came from. Everything inside the house is now falling. Searching for an exit all I can find is a window. I don't think about it to much and I jump. Outside everyone seems to be waiting and I'll Hyun is looking at me with worry as he takes Ga Eul off my back and places her in his arms._

_"Thank you! Thank you!" Her mother cries as she rushes toward us. _

_"Paramedics will be here soon" Il Hyun says. I shift back to my human form and Il Hyun is quick to toss me a pair of shorts. From a distance I can hear the sirens and I simply take Ga Eul out of Il Hyun's hands._

_She feels so light, looks so weak._

_"I'm sorry" I whisper to her. _

_It doesn't take long for the ambulance to arrive and though the paramedics insist on taking her off my hands I refuse. Somehow I can't help but want her to myself at a moment like this. _

_"Your going to be okay I promise" I say to her trying to offer her some comfort. To lost in my own thoughts I don't realize that she's opened her eyes until I look back to her face. I smile at her but she doesn't smile back. Her body begins to shake in my arms and terror screams out in her eyes. It's like watching a dozen thoughts running through her mind. Her eyes in that moment were like an open book._

_"No. Please"_

_"Please don't hurt me"_

_"Please. Don't say anything"_

_"please"_

_In that moment I felt my own heart clench. I was ashamed of myself. She was terrified of me. She hated me I knew it. Though it was soft I could feel a small pressure on my chest where her hands were._

_"Get away from me" Her eyes screamed out in horror. I didn't realize that my knees had given out until the paramedics had taken her out of my arms._

_"Yi Jeong! Yi Jeong! Are you Alright"_

_"What have I done…."_

"I asked you what you're doing here!" Jan Di shouts again not letting go of her grip on my shirt.

"Jan Di! What are you doing?" Jun Pyo says pulling her away from me. Her fiery eyes glare at him but she says nothing.

"He saved her" Jun Pyo says quietly and for a moment Jan Di turns back to me and I'm shocked to see tears in her eyes.

"Don't you think I know that!" She says to Jun Pyo.

"Don't you think I hate the fact that my best friend was going through so much on her own and she never said anything" Jan Di says her voice cracking before a sob escapes her lips. In a flash Jun Pyo is already at her side trying to comfort her and for a second I envy them simply wishing that I could have been a better person toward her.

"I know what I did to her was wrong" I hear myself say but somehow my voice sound to rough from lack of sleep these past few weeks.

"I know that I can never take anything I said back and I'll have to live with what I did. But. Just let me stay here with her" I tell her. For a second Jan Di is quiet her eyes bloodshot from crying.

"Okay" She says after a moment.

"I can't stay here because of school. And. Her mom's still in surgery." Jan Di says her eyes sad.

"Just. Don't leave her alone" She manages to say.

"I won't" I tell her.

"I'll take you home" Jun Pyo tells her gently before leading her away and once again I am left alone with her.

The room once again silent except for the beeping of the heart monitor. I don't know what'll happen when she waked up but I know I can't stay here. Not if she's afraid of me. I'm selfish enough to admit that I don't ever want to stay away from her even if she's afraid of me. I've done to much already for her to hate me that I know nothing will ever fix this.

"I'm sorry" I tell her again only this time her heart monitor does a small little beep. For a moment I wonder if that was for me but I quickly forget that thought knowing that she would never feel anything but fear and hate for me.

Sorry for the short chapter. Anyways next time it's Ga Eul's point of view after she wakes up. What will happen when she goes back to school? And where does Yi Jeong stand in her life after saving her?


	7. Ch1 part 7 Waking up to Nothing (Ga Eul)

**Hi everyone. Before I start I have a few things to say. After the next part of the chapter which will end with Parkers point of view I will start with Chapter 2 (Finally) This was just to give you guys a background story to fully understand where the characters in the story are going. After Parkers point of view which I will try to post this week later we can move on to the romance which will start in chapter 2. Also I wrote a poem called Mask. If your interested in reading my poetry book it will hoefully be out by this month or the next. Once again it's not required to read this story but it sort of gives an inside look to Ga Eul's feelings.**

_There was no one to help no one to save me. The fire kept getting bigger and bigger, Swallowing everything up in it's path. I could hear him laughing at me telling me how unworthy I was. How utterly useless I am. He's going to kill me I know it. Those dark cold dead eyes have looked at me for years but tonight; tonight I know I'll die. He shifts into his wolf form and I back away only to scream in pain when my right shoulder burns. Like a flash I can fell how fast my skin burns. He leaps up to attack me but I can't move, can't scream. I can't do anything other than close my eyes and wait for the impact. Would I feel much pain? Or would I be gone in a flash and feel nothing but darkness and emptiness? I wait for a few minutes but nothing comes so I open my eyes. He's gone. There's no one here. The walls are caving in around me and I know the fire is going to take me. Let my entire flesh burn while I scream._

"_Somebody please! Somebody!" _

"Somebody please! Somebody!"

I can feel the fire burning me hands are grabbing my arms and I don't dare open my eyes. Was I in hell? Was I still trapped inside that horrible place?

"Ga Eul! Ga Eul calm down!"

It's Jan Di's voice that finally makes me open my eyes her eyes are filled with concern when she looks at me and I know she's been crying.

"Just calm down okay" Jun Pyo says gently and it's the first time I notice him. Two nurses come in a red head and a blond they have a small cart and my heart begins to race.

"Hold her down please" One of them says and at the look of pity that both Jun Pyo and Jan Di give me makes my stomach drop. Flashes of the fire, of my father, and of Yi Jeong cloud my mind as a needle is inserted inside my arm.

"They know. Everyone knows"

It's blurry. I'm not sure if I'm awake or if I'm asleep only that I might be in and out. I can feel someone holding my hand caressing my hair, my cheek. They touch is so warm, so gentle I don't want this person to stop.

"You care about her to" I hear someone say.

"She'll never trust me" I hear someone else say but somehow his voice is comforting to me as I fade to the darkness again.

"Everything's going to be okay I promise"

This time I know this voice. I can recognize it because I've heard it my entire life. When I open my eyes my mother's looking at me. Her kind eyes showing concern for me. Even pity and I feel my throat closing up and the air begin to lack in my lungs.

"Pity" I thought to myelf. That's what I'll become to everyone. I will no longer be the weird girl, the quiet one. Had Yi Jeong told everyone about who I was? Had he so viciously been the one to spill my secrets out to everyone. I'd rather be hated than pitied. Hate I could deal with; I'd been hated my entire life by everyone but pity? Pity was the only thing I never wanted to see in anyone's eyes; Not for me. . Silently I feel a tear falling down my cheek and that's when I know; that's when I realize everything had finally crumbled. The last shards of my heart, of my soul, had finally vanished and I was broken far beyond repair. I could hear my mother talking to me trying to comfort me. I could see her hand on my arm but I couldn't feel it anymore. I couldn't feel anything. I was wrapped by artificial warmth given to me by the sheets I was wrapped in but I fell so cold. The light seemed to finally minimize inside my hear the soft flame finally flickering off. I could no longer hear anything spoken to me, not a sound, not anything. Time had frozen over and hell had consumed me burying me alive. There was nothing. I was nothing. I could hear his voice inside my head surrounding me. Screaming at me once more. All I could think of at the moment was how right he had been.

It was like being in a dream; being broken. I was in an out of a constant emptiness. I preferred it;the darkness. Every time I was outside of it I learned more things about what everyone knew now. What would become of me. My father was dead. I felt nothing, no sadness, no anger, not a shred of regret. Did that make me monster? Was I like him? Maybe. After all I am his daughter. I could see the concern in my mothers eyes, the concern in Jan Di and Jun Pyo's eyes but I no longer cared. I no longer wanted to keep putting on that mask. Why bother when everyone knew? When everyone finally saw through it. . Then there was that mark. It no longer hurt. I had been in the hospital for 2 weeks that much I was aware of. It was still healing. A burn like that; a mark like that would never go away. It would always be a constant reminder of that horrible day. A reminder of what my life was, what my father was, what I would always be. It seemed like all the ugly, all the failure, everything that was ever wrong about me finally bubbled to the surface and that was that mark.

"Ga Eul. It's time to go" My mother says gently taking me by the hand and leading me out. I can see Jan Di Jun Pyo, and Il Hyun waiting for us there eyes show concern but I don't understand why it is or why they've stuck around for so long. They know the truth and yet their still here?

"My father's arranged for you to stay at a new house." I hear Il Hyun say but it's the last thing I hear before my world once again goes black and I am stuck inside my mind once more.

The nightmares won't stop. Every night I wake up screaming. Everything that clouds my mind all the negative, all those hateful words. They all bubble to the surface when night begins to consume me. I don't sleep. Not anymore. I've been away from school for so long but I don't regret it. The King arranged counseling for me. I won't speak. I refuse to speak to anyone about it. Not Jan Di, Jun Pyo, my mother, especially not a stranger. They've given me medication for anxiety but I don't take it. I've thought about it killing myself. The thought feel so tempting. I've gathered so many pills that I could take them and just go to sleep. Forever. I've hidden them under my mattress in a small bag. Every night that I don't sleep I concentrate on them. Thinking if this should be the night. If this could be the moment. The thought of leaving my mother alone stops me. Jan Di and Jun Pyo come to visit me every single day. I don't speak, they do. They tell me about their day sometimes and when I do listen I imagine that I'm here. Jan Di, and that I have someone like Jun Pyo with me. Someone who cares about me so deeply, so profoundly that they'd do anything for me. Someone to love me. Then I realize my life has nothing and I wake up from those dreams. I know somewhere out there he's waiting for me; my soul mate but I can't live like this anymore. I'm far to afraid of rejection, far to afraid to face the love of my life only for him to realize I'm not what he expected or deserved. Thinking of him makes my heart ache. How could he ever love someone so broken and frail as I am.

_Going back to school was the hardest thing I've had to do so far. I was so afraid of the whispers, the gossip, the hate. What would people say about me? However none of that horrified me more than seeing him again. Yi Jeong. I hadn't seen him since the fire and I was far to afraid to face him. Now far more than I had ever been. He had seen through my mask, past my walls, and discovered the truth hidden deep under my soul. He knew exactly who I was. How truly hateful, and utterly worthless I am. On that first day back Jun Pyo and Jan Di were both at my side. If I still felt anything maybe I would have felt warmth; but I felt cold, alone and empty. I couldn't look up anymore, didn't dare to look at everyone. Their silence spoke volumes to me about what they thought, what they felt; pity. It was like walking on egg shells. Each step I took seemed to sound off and echo through out the halls disrupting the silence. I could feel their eyes on me. Judging me, pitying me. I wanted to close my eyes and somehow wind up back in my room but I wasn't. I was still here._

_*Bump, Ba-bump, Ba- bump*_

_My racing heart was all it took to know he was near me. I didn't want to see him. I couldn't face him yet. Not today, maybe not ever._

_*Bump, Ba-bump, Ba- bump*_

_The closer to my locker the faster my heart sped. I felt as though my heart would jump out of my chest any second or at most explode inside me from the tension._

"_Please" I wanted to say to Jan Di._

"_Pleas don't make me see him." I wanted to say but like always I could never find my voice; not that I had spoken since the accident. Jan Di must have somehow seen then tension of at least felt it by my body language because I felt a hand on my back run up and down._

"_It's okay" She spoke in concern._

"_You can use my locker Jun Pyo will get your books out of yours" She says gently. _

_*Bump, Ba-bump, Ba- bump*_

_*Bump, Ba-bump, Ba- bump*_

_Faster and faster my heart races and I can feel our paths crossing. I don't dare look up at him now more than ever. I silently plead to god not to let him see me, not to let him stop me. Not to say anything. My feet can't seem to move faster and I feel like a snail slowly walking past him. When it's over and we've past several lockers I can't seem to breathe. I don't realize it but I'm gasping out for air._

"_It's okay. It's going to be okay. Just breathe" Jan Di says concerned_

For the most part people ignore me. They don't bother me. No longer do I hear anyone say or whisper anything about me. The halls have gone silent, he's gone silent. The teachers no longer as anything of me. They don't expect me to turn things in on time, to participate in class or to even do homework. Not that I do it either. I no longer feel the need to do anything. What's the point of striving. Of wanting to better myself if in the end there is nothing, there will never be anything.. To lost in my own thoughts I don't notice Scott Miller. It's only when I feel myself falling and my books flying everywhere that I snap out of my own thoughts.

"Watch were the hell you're going you stupid mute!" He yells his screams echoing out through the hallway.

"Didn't you hear me!" He yells grabbing my arm harshly and pulling me up only to push me back down on to the ground. I can fell the sting on my hands as I land but still I don't dare say a word.

"Yi Jeong was right! People like you shouldn't exist" He says before he spits at me and walks away. The hallway that is silent now seems all the more if that were possible.

"Come on Ga Eul" Jan Di says when she is suddenly at my side but I can't seem to get up or move.

"He's right. I shouldn't exist." I say to myself. Jan Di and Jun Pyo take me home early. Jan Di cleans me up and spends the day with me trying to comfort me take care of me. But it's far to late for that. I keep checking the clock waiting for her to leave and she does when my mom arrives. For a few moments I contemplate what to do. I check my mattress to make sure that the pills are there.

"It has to be tonight" I tell myself before going over to my desk and taking out a piece of paper and a pen. There I write my letter. Something to hopefully give my mother closure.

"Ga Eul come downstairs for dinner" She calls out and I simply put the note away under my mattress before going downstairs. I don't make conversation with my mother I just pretend to listen. My eyes keep shifting to the clock on the wall counting down the moments for what I am about to do. I don't regret what I'm about to do.

"I just want to be at peace" I whisper to myself though my mother does not hear me.

"Ga Eul honey you have to eat something. You have to get better" She pleads and I can see the sadness in her eyes but I don't let it faze me.  
"I have to do this for me" I think to myself.

"Just a few bites. At least eat your vegetable. Please honey. Just try" She begs again. Slowly I reach for a steamed carrot on my plate and I take a small bite. Every night it's like this. She'll plead with me to eat. The most I do is take a few bites of this or that. When I think about the irony I want to laugh. Months ago I would have killed for food but now; now I wouldn't care if I starved to death or not. Not that I was hungry now. She doesn't say anything to me when I push the plate of food away like every single night. She doesn't try to hug me anymore or tell me that things are going to be okay. I think deep down she knows it'll never be okay. I can see the hurt in her eyes when I move to walk away and the longing she has to just hold me. Somehow I find myself not needing it. Not wanting anyone's touch. The first thing I do when I head to my room is lock the door. I don't want my mom to come in. Not until tomorrow. I make my way to my bed and move the mattress aside.

My heart seems to stop and I feel myself shake. The pills are gone. The note is gone. My hands seem to search endlessly for them making the mattress fall on to the floor with a loud thump. I don't hear my mother running up the stairs nor do I hear the pounding on the door as she calls my name.

"Their gone" I think to myself.

"No"

I don't realize it but I am screaming now. My body shaking as tears run down my face. This was my way out. This was the only thing I could do.

"Something. Anything" I think to myself going over to my desk and trying to find anything at all. Something to end it. My mothers cries are void to my ears.

"No!"  
I can't find anything at all but when my eyes land on the frame on my nightstand I take it in my hands and I smash it on to the ground. The glass falling to the floor. My hands shake as I pick up the biggest shard of glass and I clutch it in my hands.

"I have to end it" I think to myself as I raise the shard of glass to my left wrist. I'm not aware of anything else except observing as the shard of glass is descending toward my wrist. I don't hear someone come in through my window only reacting when his hand is on my neck and suddenly. Nothing.

"I'm so sorry" I hear that same comforting voice whisper before I'm fully succumbed to the darkness once more.

**Thank you for reading. Next chapter will be Yi Jeongs turn. I also want to say that once I finish this story I will be putting up a fun quiz up on the website I have my Original Version of Fixing the Soul.**

**For those of you who don't know my original Story is called Fixing the Soul (Werewolf Prince) My lead characters I came up with myself their called Lyric (Ga Eul) and Parker (Yi Jeong) Which is why you'll find different names on here sometimes. Lol. **

**Anyways thank you for reading!**


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